Rudeness

Rudeness is exactly the opposite of etiquette: lack of consideration, courtesy and respect towards others.

Some acts of rudeness include:

1) Cutting into a checkout line at the store.
2) Speaking loudly on the cell phone, so everybody hears you.
3) Spitting on the sidewalk.
4) Treating a service provider with arrogance.
5) Not cleaning after your pet.
6) Speaking obscenities in public places.
7) Littering.
8) Smoking in non-smoking places.
9) Making cynical or sarcastic comments with the pure intention to hurt your listener.
10) Not controlling your kids.

But, how do you react to rudeness?

Do not lose your temper and always keep control of your emotions and your feelings.Remember, if you take it personal, you lose. So, don’t!

Assess the situation and don’t let rudeness be in control instead of you. With your kindness and courtesy in control, everybody wins.

Treat People like People!

Beggars, chuggers, sales assistants, market researchers etc...always treat them with a good-humoured, polite response. Even if your response is 'No' - it's worth lengthening it to 'No thank you' - most people do respect this and many will often respond in a polite manner too.

When someone asks you for money, a simple 'I can't' or 'I'm sorry' costs you nothing. Rudely stalking past or snapping costs you your dignity. Begging is often not just about asking for money, it's about asking for social recognition or interaction and who are we to deny anyone this?

Also we must remember the adage, never crap on those below you on the social ladder, because you might meet them on your way down.

On Mobile Phone

There are some circumstances where a mobile phone should not be used at all: turn the thing off or let it in silent mood for a little while. These are circumstances where the ringtone and ensuing conversation would be obtrusive, such as at a movie, concert, or church service.

There are some circumstances where using a mobile phone is fine, as long as the user thinks anyone who happens to be actually standing near them. Think of a person standing in line at the supermarket. Before s/he gets to the cash register, they may talk away. Once they get to the register, however, it's time to say 'Look, I'll call you back in a minute,' and hang up. Remember that the person standing behind the cash register is just that - a person, and should be treated as such.

As long as you don't ignore the people standing around you, and don't talk really loudly, and the conversation doesn't intrude on what you're doing, talk all you want.

Street Etiquette

With our pathways growing under the weight of pedestrians, we should all pay heed to the following...

• Don't meander along in the centre of the pavement, especially if holding hands with someone.
• Leave space for others walking faster to pass by.
• If standing talking or at a bus stop, also leave space for passers-by.
• A keep-to-the-right convention would be good to avoid those head-on encounters where you side-step in unison.
• Please don't spit or discard chewing gum on the pavement

At Restaurant or Dinner Party

"Traditionally, men remain standing until women are seated. This is an especially nice gesture when guests are of different generations, such as grandsons showing courtesy and respect to their grandmothers. Men assist women with their chairs unless the waiter or host does."


Credit: Cecelia Pading

On the Public Transport

Few etiquette for riding on the buses or any form of public transport:

Giving up your seat - Standing up for younger children especially those not yet in their teens is a matter of safety as they do not yet have as well defined a level of balance as an adult yet. While you can quite happily manage the bends and sharp halts, a child can't. So if you do see a mother struggling with a younger child give up your seat, she is not only having to balance herself but also her child.

Smells - If you're going to use the bus (or any other form of public transport) you're going to be in close proximity to other users. Do them a favor and control excess smells; we're talking about body odor, bad breath and pungent food.

Volume - Keep the volume down on your personal stereo! For heaven's sake, we don't want to hear it.

Personal space - You with the newspaper - keep your elbows in please.

Queues - Admittedly these days there are multiple queues for different buses all at the same stop. But try and remember who got there before when it comes to getting onto your bus and don't push too far ahead of others when your bus does eventually turn up accompanied by two others on the same route.

Seating - Don't have a place for you and a place for your bag - you'll only have to put them on the floor when someone wants a seat, so save yourself the hassle. Also, don't sit on the aisle seat and leave the window seat vacant - it's just inconsiderate and unnecessary.

Entering the Church (Late)

The time to arrive at church is before the service starts, but for some unknown reason, it has become the custom - or rather the bad habit - for some to come to church late.

If you arrive after the Divine Liturgy begins, try to enter the church quietly - and observe what is happening. If the Epistle or Gospel is being read or the Little or Great Entrance is taking place, wait until it is finished to quickly find a seat. If Father is giving the sermon, stay in the back until he has concluded. If in doubt, check and see if it is a good time to seat yourself. Try not to interrupt the Liturgy with your entrance.

By the way, the best way to avoid this problem is to arrive on time - then you don't have to wonder if it's okay to come in or not. People who come late to the Liturgy should not partake of the Eucharist!